After Stars Fall
by colerfulldarkness666
Summary: The angels have fallen to Earth but some rose. As they adjust to their practically human lives now they realize the hardships life comes with and they try to get back to how they were before. Meanwhile, an army is gathering against them. Basically some angel family with a dash of Destiel and Sabriel
1. Burning

Burning, so much burning. He had been used to it but his time walking as a human had softened him, at first the burning surprised him as he had let out an agonizing yell. After awhile those anguished cries subdued to moans and grunts.

He heard another's yell, one that echoed and echoed his. That archangel was not used to this and for that, he smirked. That would take time.

But then, the burning was gone. The cool air burned almost worst than the hellfire as it washed over his being, he kept his eyes shut confused. When he finally got used to the renewed sensation he opened his eyes. Stars. Stars scattered the inky blue heavens, a sliver of a moon suspended in the sky. He was lying in a grassy field, the forest a few yards away. What was he doing here? He should be deep in the Pit in agony with his dear brother. But no, the Morning Star was now standing in the world of Man. He felt anger and confusion, did he get put here as punishment, his own personal hell? Because then Father was right, this would most definitely be worst.

He glanced down at himself. He was in a surprisingly nicely built body, tall and slender but strong limbed, dirty blond hair. He was taken aback by how closely he looked like his True Self as he had been in Heaven. Except for his Grace. He almost felt panicked. His Grace was weak, weaker than it had been in the Pit.

He growled then let out an anguish yell. He pounded the Earth then stood and yelled, cursed and let out long held rage and loathing. He'd rather take death. Once he finished his throat was raw and the forest echoed him. The tiny bit of light in this was that Michael wasn't around, at least not yet.

But he knew this was his new curse and he wasn't going to take it dwindling. As he took a step he noticed something glimmer under starlight in the grass. He picked it up, an angel blade. He sighed. In truth he would need it, others may try to come after him, and with his Grace so weak he needed to be armed. Lucifer began walking on.


	2. Silence

The silence. It was accepted, it helped. It allowed him to think and open up to what had been and what would now be. His Grace was very weak and he found an angel blade nearby. He sat crossed legged on a small bald hill.

He did what had been right, what had been asked of him. Right? He was given the order and he had done as his Father asked, right? But it should not have gone like this, no this was not right. What had he done w_rong_? His Father had strict orders that he followed to the letter, he had even bowed to the humans. He had done as Lucifer hadn't. Yet he was dragged into the Pit. He could easily blame the Winchesters but . . . but they were God's creation, under God's will. Then why? Why had he allowed this?

Not just him, his brothers. Before being dragged done Lucifer had spoken true, they were all under God's will but also had to follow under it with their own judgment. But him, Lucifer, Raphael, Gabriel, Castiel? They were only doing what was God's will. Or at least . . . what they thought was God's will. What they thought.

Gabriel, he simply did not want to be a part of it, he left. But when it came to it, he sided with humans, people. And he died.

Raphael followed orders under Michael and did so coolly, he did what he saw as what was needed, yet Castiel killed him.

But Castiel was whole heartily doing what he thought was right. He was protecting the Winchesters, the humans. He looked out for them and lived amongst them more than any of the others had. And Father had brought him back many times. But now, he was human.

Lucifer didn't want to accept Father's wishes, he wanted things done his own way, because he thought it was _right_. Yet he followed through with the prophecy. He got dragged down to the Pit.

He himself was simply doing what he saw right, what he saw Father's will to be. Yet he was dragged right along with Lucifer.

What did he do wrong? What had they all done wrong, so wrong that they all deserved this. They couldn't all be wrong, what had they missed.

Michael was getting frustrated. He stood and yelled up. 'What do you want from us? What do we need to do?!"

But as usual, there was no answer.

He was the eldest, he was to lead his brothers, but he _failed_. He had lost and he was beginning to wonder. Because it had all been for nothing. For nothing, and his brothers, he had lost them. Brash Lucifer, mischievous Gabriel, collected Raphael and innocent Castiel, he had lost them all. He had given them up for what he thought his Father wanted but now that was incomplete and he didn't have his brothers. The brothers he missed terribly. But this couldn't be what his Father wanted? He didn't want them to suffer, there must be a deeper purpose, one he was missing.

He wasn't sure what he needed to do but he knew it wasn't just standing around. He would find the Winchesters, Castiel would be with them. Maybe he could convince them to forgive him. Hhhmm . . . forgiveness. There was something there; perhaps this was what it was all about.

And Lucifer. If he had gotten out maybe he did to. Maybe he had changed, was it too much to hope for? And the others?

He shook his head, one step at a time.

He found that he was in a brown windbreaker and a black polo. He was relatively tall with wide shoulders, built body and dark, short curly black hair. He looked, well like himself. He grabbed the angel knife and put it in his jacket pocket. He would need it; angels would be hunting each other.

This filled him with new urgency and purpose. He had to find his brothers, he needed to protect them, after all that's what big brothers did.


	3. Stupid

This was stupid. This was plain bullshit. He had remembered being stabbed in the chest by his brother. Yeah he probably shouldn't call him that but whatever, family's had spats, right? And he was pissed, hell, he was still pissed. He was going to screw over his big bro for sure.

And then he woke up. In a hospital. A freaking hospital. Uh, no. Archangels don't need this type of help. Sure he could feel that his Grace was pretty weak and he hardly had a quarter of his true power. And he didn't mind humans that much, but still it wounded his pride. All in all he was the one who did the tricks, not the other way around.

"Haha, very funny Dad. Guess you do have a sense of humor? A pretty dam hissy one!" he yelled angrily, the heart monitor beeping erratically. "Oh, shut the hell up!" he growled. This wasn't exactly his smartest action, yelling into his empty room, making the monitors go haywire.

A nurse bustled in. 'Is anything wrong? It's good you're awake."

"Uh, yeah, can you get me my doctor, please doll face? I wanna talk to him."

She blushed slightly but nodded. 'Right away." And left.

He immediately jumped up and began taking off all the patches and such. He saw a stack of clothing on the chair and took it then opened the window. He was grateful for being only on the second floor and having access to a tree. He immediately jumped out and down and made his way, at the base of the tree he paused and leaned against it. _Wow, I don't think I'm supposed to feel dizzy._ He shook it off and began to dress in the shadow of the tree. He honestly didn't care that the older lady at the window gave a cry and turned away. "Hey, this is the only freebee you get." He called.

A block over he snuck into an alleyway and immediately shucked the hospital gown in a dumpster and took of the wrist band.

He wore a white button up with a blazer and jeans with sturdy shoes. Not to mention the angel blade, nice touch Dad. He made his way out. He had a few twenties in his back pocket and knew he had to make the most of it. He found a nearby park and thought over what could happen.

He hardly had any Grace and he wasn't stupid, something had gone down. Something that would have Him need him back. Did that mean the others would be back too? That made him perk up a little. Were Michael and Lucifer back? Maybe even Raphael? He was certain Cas would be with the Winchesters. He should probably try to get to them. They did kinda owe him anyways and he was sure Cas wouldn't turn him down, though he was still but hurt how he chose them over him.

It was weird, being dead. It's like he had watched a bleary film. Like he knew stuff, he sensed it. Such as that there was an open season on angels by the angels. He needed to get to Cas, he knew that Cas had done somthing.

As a messenger of God he had been able to pretty much just know where things were but now that his Grace was reduced it was hard.

He tried focusing on Castiel, nothing. He then thought of Lucifer, Raph and Mike. Zip, nada. He sighed then though maybe something more concentrated, more grouped. He thought of Sam, Dean and Cas. He felt something almost like a fluttering in the back of his mind, his Grace seemed to move a little but then that was it. And he felt tired. But he had gotten a general direction. "Well." Gabriel sighed. "Guess I'm heading west."


	4. Alone

He was alone. Yes, he awoke in a city, bustling with people and noise. But he stood all alone in the alley. He had woken up against a grimy wall in a plain gray button up and jeans. He glanced around as he stood. He looked at himself, a slender figure, not very tall, with short black hair.

He felt the panic bubbling up but he shut it down. He shut down the confusion, the guilt, the regret and fear. He just walked, just did as he always did.

He immediately saw the angel knife glittering by his side and tucked it away.

He walked and walked, by rushing people. He was inside himself though. His Grace. It was practically gone. He could feel it there, a very small portion of what it was and something else familiar in it, but not much. And his wings were gone.

But in a way that was fine because, well at least he was alive.

He stopped. He felt . . . relieved, almost happy, because he was alive. But he was human. He should be boiling with anger but he wasn't because he was thankful that he was even there. He should be dead, does that mean others lived now? His mind strayed to Gabriel and his other brothers but then he shook it off. He doubted they were back around.

Then he realized being human he had needs. He walked into a small café like restaurant, he sat himself down. A lady came over and asked what he would like.

He stared at the menu. "I have never had any of these."

"Oh, so you're new to our café. Well I recommend the turkey oven roast; I think it's one of our best." She smiled.

He blinked then nodded. "Very well. And something warm perhaps?"

"Coffee?"

He shrugged then nodded.

"Coming right up!"

Once he left he stared out. He saw some tall buildings and different sorts of people, it wasn't overly cold but still chilly. And near night time. When she gave him the food he stared at it for awhile. He finally picked it up and took a small bite. He blinked.

The food tasted . . . _good_. It made him feel . . . _good_. He now felt alarmed. How and why was this giving him such a warm feeling, he did not like feeling. Yet it was addictive. He took another bite and chewed then another. Halfway through he took in too much and bean coughing. When he stopped he reached for the mug of 'coffee' and drank some . He started at the burning sensation, it was _hot_. He was able to swallow done the food in his surprise but now his tongue burned. He concentrated on the burning feeling, willing it to go away. And suddenly it did.

He sat still and fingered his tongue, how odd. But he still had half a sandwich to go through. Once he finished he careful drank the murky dark liquid, slowly. Honestly it wasn't all that bad.

Once he finished he noticed something different on his face. He fingered his mouth and noticed he had a smile. He immediately composed his face, why would he smile?

Then the lady came back. 'How was your meal?"

"Very delicious. Thank you."

She grinned. "Good. Here's your check. But there's no rush."

He stared at the piece of paper and numbers on it. He was sure he was missing something. Of course, payment.

"Is there a problem with your check sir?" a man asked. He wore a name tag that claimed he was the manager.

"Not . . . particularly."

"Oh."

"It seems I am unable to give you proper payment. I have no currency."

The man's face slowly turned into an interesting shade of red. "Wh-what?! Are you foreign or something?"

"In a manner of speaking." He said mildly as he stood and dusted himself off. "But the meal was delicious. Even the services were adequate."

The man scoff. "I see. Well I'm bloomy happy you enjoyed your meal, yet you have this audacity to say you can't pay for it. What is flamin' wrong with you?! You cannot simply eat and think by giving a thanks that is enough."

Then allow me to rephrase it. "Thank you, may God repay you."

He spluttered. "God? God!? Are you off you meds?! If we gave that response for everything the world would be in chaos. In utter chaos! It's- it's irresponsible is what it is?"

He bristled at that and shifted.

"Who do you think you are?!"

"I am Raphael."

"So!? You're a nutcase is what. Imma call the cops. Don't you know others have to live also!"

"You should go." Someone said from the side. It was his waitress. She had a sad look. "He really will, just go. I'll cover the bill, it's not much anyways."

He was confused. "But why would you do that?"

She gave him an odd look and a rueful smile. "Because it's the humane thing to do? I would have had to anyway when you just left."

He blinked. "Thank . . . you.'

She nodded and began picking up dishes as if her boss wasn't still ranting.

He then turned and promptly left. He was confused by this. He would have expected the police force or even working to repay the debt. But this lady, this person he had no knowledge of beyond her career of food servicing, paid for him because it was 'humane'.

H e paused then continued walking. The humans were an odd group.

He slept in an alleyway that night. The next day he walked and so forth. He would walk, seeking some purpose and sleep where he could. He slept on a park bench two nights but was kicked out by the police force. He also spent some nights under bridges.

One night it hit him hard he wondered why he hadn't noticed it. He was by a trashcan on fire when a lady and a man approached. They shared the fire and they spoke quietly, he simply listened.

"Yes, I'm trying to get back to Ohio, my brother's there."

"The same one you said that kicked you out?" the man questioned gruffly.

"Yes." She sniffed.

"Why you do some stupid move like that?"

"Because he family. And no matter what he'll take me in, he'll help me."

He snorted.

"It's true. He done it before. No matter what, family won't leave you be. Not like this, not mine. We was real close when younger and I've been stupid with the drugs and all. But he'll take me, I know he will." She noticed Raphael looking at her. She nodded fiercely. 'Family ain't gonna let you go that easy.'

He returned his gaze to the flames. Was it true? Would his brothers take him back with good grace. Well maybe not completely, but still. He felt the odd sensation bubbling up and he tried to push it back down. He didn't even know if they were around. But still, he had nothing better to do, he could try and look for them.


	5. Sucked

It sucked really. Dean felt horrible and on edge with everything that is going on. Kevin was stressing and freaking, trying to translate the tablet and doing research. Sam was still pretty weak and Stupid Zeke was just telling him it would be better soon. And because of said stupid Zeke, Cas wasn't there.

All in all his life was overall sucking. He took a sip from his beer and glanced around while Sam was on the couch reading. It made him antsy and feel useless.

He should be ganking something about now. He should be doing something important. Sam seemed fine at the moment and Kevin was taking a well deserved nap somewhere. He liked the bunker, he really did, but it just didn't feel, whole? It felt too empty.

All at once he stood up, he had to get out. 'So, uh, I guess, I'll go get that milk now?"

"Yeah?" Sam raised an eyebrow.

"Yup." He walked to a small table to grab his keys.

Sam rolled his eyes used to his unusual brother. "Okay, and the soap, and the chicken, and the cheese, and the veggies and everything else on the list we made."

Dean blinked then groaned. 'Where is it?"

'On the table. Where I left it for you two days ago."

"Put your bitch face away, jeez."

Sam snorted. 'Whatever."

After a moment of silence Dean sighed and gabbed a duffle he always had at hand by the door way. 'Actually, I might be awhile. A long while. I'm going to do some recon, just check some stuff out."

"Recon? For a case?" Sam raised an eyebrow looking at the duffle.

"Sure, why not?" he shrugged.

Sam rolled his eyes, suspecting exactly where he was going. "I could go if you want."

"No, no. You stay and rest up."

'I am rested.' He cried.

'Bench press 100 then we'll talk." He said as he grabbed his keys, and the list.

Instead of insisting Sam smirked "Tell him hi for me!"he called as the door slammed shut.

He went to his Baby and was soon peeling out the drive way. He played a cassette and weaved through whatever little traffic there was. He drove past the first town then the second. He kept going and going till he had gotten to the area he wanted to be at. He took a three hour nap at a motel to and freshened up.

He went to the store and got everything on the list and then some. He of course got some pie. After that he drove and began shifting things into a bag and then drove into a gas station. He brought down the bag and walked in and immediately headed towards the back. He got a six pack from the fridge and went up to the cashier.

'Have a swell day." The man behind the register smiled at an elderly man. He merely nodded and left.

The man with bed messy brown hair and the name tag Steve held the smile and looked up. Blue eyes met green and they shifted.

"Dean?"

"Hey Cas. Just this please!" he gave a cheeky grin.

"What are you doing here?" the formal angel asked in gruff surprise and glanced around. "And I told you, it's Steve."

He rolled his eyes, "Whatever, your name has also been Misha, still not calling you that." He took in Castiel's confused face then shook his head. "Never mind. Point is I stopped by to see you."

"Do you need something? Are you on a case? I can try and help but-"

'What? No, just came to check in."

"As in, a friendly visit? Over a few state boundaries?" he asked slowly, his face softening.

"Uh, well yeah, uh" he then looked down at his feet suddenly nervous but he swallowed it down. "And here.' He held up the grocery bag. 'You know in case you need anything."

Something in Castiel's face fell and annoyance skimmed over. "I do not need you taking care of me Dean. I am surviving well on my own." He straightened.

"I know man but, I know how tough it could be budgeting and what not, especially with lack of experience. So please, for me. Just so I know you have a little something."

Castiel sighed as he glanced out then back at Dean. "Very well, I suppose I should be gracious."

'Yes you should." He gave a teasing smirk.

Castiel rolled his eyes but a smile played at the edge of his mouth. "Thank you, it's very generous of you." As he took it.

"Well what are friends for?"

Castiel glanced in the bag and smirked. "Pie?"

"Of course! Basic food group!"

He tied the bag and put it under the counter. "How's Sam?"

He composed himself. "Well you know, Sam. Still bitchy face and tall but he's good. He says hi."

"Even with the trials?"

"He's . . . recovering."

"Well that's very good for him, send him my regards. Any hunts?"

"Meh. So you got yourself a place, right?"

"Yes I found a suitable apartment that works with my paycheck."

'Good, good. So how's Nora and the pint size squealer."

He gave a small smile. "She is well. I went over the other day."

Dean blinked and gave a smile. "Ah, babysitting."

'Well, no. I had covered so stuff for her and as repayment she made me lunch and I went over. The child was, well, adorable."

Dean blinked and swallowed the ugly feeling he felt. "Well, that's great. You know the way to get to them is through the kids." He winked.

Castiel rolled his eyes. "Those are not my intentions."

Dean snorted. "Of course not."

They spoke for awhile but soon more people were coming in and 'Steve' was busy.

"So, uh, I guess I'll head back now. I actually was going to work on some recon a few miles by, but nothing major, you know."

Castiel's face became blank. 'Yes, I suppose you should go and continue."

Dean didn't like how he said that. Like he was saying he should continue on with his life. A life without Cas. He felt the urge to grab Cas, to shake him and tell him everything and why he was putting their friendship in such jeopardy. But he didn't want to make a scene and knew he couldn't so instead he squeezed his shoulder firmly. 'Take care."

"You to Dean." He said somberly as he turned from him.

Dean left and went into his car, turning it on, trying to ignore the painful guilt in his chest, the bile in his throat, the same feeling he got whenever he left Cas.


	6. Running

He ran faster, breath coming in pants. He chanced a glance behind him and smirked as he kept running. He took a right at an alley then a hard left. He came to a gate and quickly scrambled over it and jumping to the other side.

The men behind him cursed and yelled. Lucifer only grinned as he kept running. Finally losing them he made way to another area of town, one with abandoned buildings. He had found himself a relatively dry, nice area with a trucker stop just s block away.

He had conned the men for their moneys and got caught. He then snatched their wallets and took off running. He didn't care for the credit cards and such, he had no idea how to hack into them, but cash, cash was good.

Sometimes, like tonight, he teased them and ran. Usually he would stay and fight. He wasn't as smart as Raphael, as determined as Castiel, not just a natural leader as Michael, and even though he taught Gabriel his tricks he wasn't as good with them, but he sure as hell was always a fighter.

He sighed as he leaned on the crusty wall. He remembered once when he and Gabriel had snuck into Michaels 'room' and took a few choice weapons. They had taken off running, hearing him behind them. They finally hid in a garden and laughed till they were caught. He was surprised by how much he missed those days, how much he yearned for them.

But as for now there was nothing he could do but roam around. It had been about three weeks since he first awoke and he was scrambling. Part of him, a part he wouldn't admit, was frustrated by the humans.

They were those that lived on top like nothing. They ate till they could barf and bought the most ridiculous things simply because the power was at their disposal. They could be corrupted and used their position to shift things their way. Then there were those that lived in the streets. The scrounged for meager bits of food and went to far extents to get some bit of shelter and food. They stole, and fought, they would rape and kill. There was danger everywhere, danger from each other, yet there they were.

He saw them smile and laugh still. He had seen them fall and _laugh _then keep going. They would still live on despite being so vulnerable and . . . unskilled. He didn't understand. They knew of the evils among them yet they would live on _and _would still give thanks and go to prayers to his Father. He had left them there, unarmed and open for anything to hit them, yet they prayed to Him, worshipped and _loved _Him.

Did they not realize they had been abandoned? That he wasn't giving them help?

It wasn't long before he was moving again. He passed by a school church house and scoffed as he walked by. He honestly considered the possibility of burning it down, Would Father dearest finally wake up just to strike him done or something. Maybe that would finally get His attention.

The bell ranged and students ran out, Sisters watched over. He slung his raggedy back pack, that he "found", and continued walking by the fence. A ways over was a well and some children were around it and talking to a Sister there.

"Well," she said. "A woman once fell into one of these and she held to the side as it began to rain. She had faith in God and knew he would save her. As she prayed a man came over and called 'would you like a rope?' she replied that she was fine because she knew God would save her. Awhile later a couple passed through and called 'Do you need help out?' she replied that she was fine and would be saved soon. The water was now to her chin and she was losing her grip. A man passed through to another town and he asked 'Do you need help, I can pull you out?'"

"And she said no?" a little girl asked quickly.

The Sister nodded. "She said no, that God would save her. Unfortunately, she died. And when she did she went up to Heaven and asked God. 'Father, why didn't you save me?'"

"What he say?" a boy interrupted.

"He answered. 'I sent you help three times and each time you refused'"

After a moment another boy cried. "Oh, I get it. He sent those people to go help her but she told them no."

'She though He would actually save her with like some magic rope or something?" a girl asked.

'Exactly, but God has many ways of working, He sends people to us. Angels really or just humans but He send them with a purpose. Sometimes we may not realize it but He is trying to help us. We just have to open our hearts and see it and accept it." The Sister smiled.

"That was sad but still a really good story." A small girl said quietly.

"But wouldn't it have been cool if-if like there was a golden light and she floated up!? And then people would be like 'wow, she's risin'!'" an excited boy smiled.

The children laughed and the Sister shook her head with a smile. 'Oh hush you. Now let's go back to the others."

Even he had smirked at the boys response. Yes, humans did seem to expect that. But the story did make him think. He had thought his Father was abandoning them for the humans. Of course it was that, of course Father didn't care anymore. Right? He hadn't sent him any help, right?

_These roaches_ he huffed in annoyance. They thought Father would fox everything for them, that he would bring them in with good Grace. Well if they could, he should be allowed to. But he wondered about his own Grace. He could try to earn his good Grace but he doubted it would work, too much blood in hand.

Michael kept trying and trying to focus his Grace, to reach out for someone. He knew Castiel was out there somewhere, and perhaps his other brothers. But he couldn't reach them, his Grace was too weak. He sighed.

He was resting at a church; the Father, priest not his father, had said he was more than welcomed to stay. He was currently in a pew; he had been praying and attempting to reach his brothers. _Father, please forgive me, and my brothers. We were only trying to do you will. But do not allow us to be separated, not anymore, not after so long._ But all was silent.

He sighed and laid on the pew, perhaps sleep would do him good. He could dream of Father, of Heaven and its glory, and his family, his brothers. The next morning he woke feeling . . . what was the word . . . optimistic. He graciously thanked the Father and left walking not entirely sure yet with purpose. He was the older brother, he would work to get his family together and lead them to safety.

He had been awake for too long and had accomplished nothing, it had been near a month already. Perhaps together, he and his brothers could accomplish this.


	7. Finding

He found himself in a city, wondering around. The church was closed and Michael sighed. He remembered a time when they were always open, Sisters and Fathers lived at the churches. He needed a place to rest and heal, preferably warm. He was wondering if he could fall to human sickness, his throat was hurting, sore. Though it was little compared to the pain running down his arm, he pressed the ragged tank top to his arm harder, trying to stop the blood from seeping out, willing it to heal. I had actually been much deeper, he was able to close it up slightly with his Grace but immediately became weak and earned a bloody nose.

He had been walking through a forest when he was attacked. Two angels that recognized him. _Oh how the mighty archangel's have fallen. Thought you were in the Pit? No matter, now we can end you!_ But Michael had much training, even weak he managed to defeat them but now had a bleeding arm and nowhere to go.

He had been traveling with a fierce determination. He needed a new method, a new perspective in what Father wanted. They had all failed so perhaps together they could find something, but he would need his brothers. Especially Raphael, if his hunch was right, he may be able to still heal.

And so he found himself amongst abandoned warehouses. He picked one in the middle that was warm enough and had some old fire blankets and newspapers in the side. He set up a mediocre bed on a bench against the well and laid down with a sigh of relief. Within a few minutes though there was a loud ruckus outside. _Dear Father, what is that?_ Later in the night he would be thanking his Father.

Dean and Sam had caught wind of a vampire problem and immediately went to check it out. Sure enough some vampires were settled there. It was going okay but one got in a lucky shot. A shot that had Dean thrown through a window and unconscious.

Sam immediately tried to distract the others and killed one, now one remained.

They remained lock in their fight. She was able to pull an arm back and smirked. She sniffed at his blood and straightened. "What the hell is this? What's wrong with you?!"

Sam froze in surprise.

Dean was face down on the ground when he heard a mildly surprised voice above him. "Dean? Dean Winchester?"

"Depends who wants to know." He groaned as he began to shift. He glanced up taking in Black curly hair, striking brown eyes and a firmly built man. "Who're you?' he slurred.

Suddenly the man straightened and looked curiously into the other room.

Dean recognized Sam's voice. "Sammy!" he immediately straightened and tried to get up.

The man went over to the other room where Sam was with the vampire. She reeled to give him a finishing blow when his eyes flashed blue. "No!" and he tossed his hand up. Immediately there was a burning light and then she laid on the ground, eyes burnt and bloody.

The man's eyes widened and he recognized the Grace. "You!"

'Sam' turned around and his eyes widened. "Wha-no. No, no, no, no!"

But he wasted no time. He put his hand up and a white hot force blew through and over Sam's body. A shadow fell from Sam's body with a cry of no and was gone.

Sam stood for a moment then slumped forward. The man walked to him quickly and kneeled, placing two fingers on his forehead.

"No! Sammy!" Dean finally fully regained himself and charged over. "What the fuck you-" then he recognized the position of the two fingers. "What the hell, which one are you?! What are you _doing_?" he went to move the man but a single hand went up and held his fist. He pulled back in surprise and then the man gave a grunt as light shine from his fingers to Sam.

Sam gave a gasp and sat up, panting.

"Sam! Sammy?!"

"Dean?!" his eyes were wide as he looked around. Dean helped his brother up and they faced the man on the ground, kneeling.

'Who are you?! What did you do?!" Dean demanded and glared at him. He blinked and tried to really look at him as much as he could in the weak lighting, but he saw some recognition in him.

He seemed to be catching his breath but he looked up. 'It is I. Michael."

Their faces fell to horror. "You?!" Dean spat out. "What did you do to Sammy?!"

"I- I helped him. The angel inside of him." He shook his head and had a serious gaze. "He should not be there or any where but in his place"

"Angel? What angel?!" Sam cried bewildered.

'Nothing, he's crazy, leave it alone." Dean told him then turned back around. "And why the hell do you think you could decide that. Ezekiel was saving him!"

'Ezekiel, what?! Damit Dean what's going on?! What did you do?!" Sam cried angrily.

"What had to be done?!" he snapped.

"Ezekiel? That was not Ezekiel." Michael said rising.

Dean blinked. "Come again."

He shook his head and narrowed his eyes. "That was not Ezekiel. I know the angels and that was not he. That was another, one who failed at his duty, who allowed evil. One who had been imprisoned in Heaven."

""Prison? He was an angel criminal."

"Oh my gosh Dean, you had a criminal angel inside me, what the hell?! I thought I had to give consent!"

Dean took a deep breath. "I tricked you."

Sam blinked. "What?"

"I tricked you. I had to, the trials really took it out of you and you were dying. I had to do something to help you. Then this angel came saying he was Ezekiel and that he could save you. Cas had said he trusted Ezekiel before and that he was a good guy so I told him to save you."

"He wasn't healing him." Michael put in. "He was hiding from the other angels. From everyone. And Castiel would have known that that was not Ezekiel."

There was a long silence.

"That's why he left. No, wait he didn't leave, I bet the 'angel' said to send him away and you did." Sam snapped at Dean. "Really Dean?"

"You think I wanted to!?" Dean yelled. "I never wanted to kick Cas out but I had to, to save you!"

"Well maybe if you had let me know about this-"

"You were dying! You would have said no!"

"Maybe I would have! Hell, I should have!"

"Wait!" Michael cut in sharply into the argument. They stopped and turned to him and for a moment they felt fear. His eyes were hard and flashed with anger. "What do you mean _kicked_ Castiel out? Where is he?!"

Dean and Sam glanced at each other, each with their own guilty look.

Michael's jaw tightened as he grounded out. "Where is my brother?"

"Look, that's a whole story and we're not exactly in speaking terms with you." Dean glared.

Michael stiffened and in usual angel demeanor he answered. "Yes, well unlike that fraud, I am actually healing your brother."

"What?!" they asked dumbfounded.

He nodded sharply. "When I expelled that angel I felt Sam slipping so I tried to heal him. In order to preserve him and heal him a slipped a piece of my Grace in him to keep him alive. But because of this I have to stay near him or we will both fade." They were quiet taking this in so he said. "Now answer me, where is my brother?"

And so in the Impala they had an extra person in the back seat. Dean had his hands tight on the steering wheel glancing every now and then at the rearview mirror to the archangel. Sam had a total bitch face and was glaring out the window.

They drove and drove, Michael was tense in the backseat, arms crossed. Dean fully explained what had happened with Sam, how the angels had fallen, how "Ezekiel" had said Castiel couldn't know about him (Michael had angrily scoffed "Ezekiel would never say that, especially of Castiel.") and sending him away. Michael looked like he was trying to gather all his energy to smite them. Dean glance in the mirror and met Michael's glare.

"What?" he snapped.

Michael only glared harder.

"Shut up!" he cried. "Both of you, stop with the bitch faces."

"You abandoned my brother."

"Hey! You think I ever wanted to do that to Cas?" Dean whirled and glared at him "I wanted Cas there with us. I wanted to have him so I-we could help him! But I have a brother too and I had to protect him. Since you're suddenly all brotherly you of all people should understand how it is!"

"The oldest must protect his younger ones." He said it almost like an apology and sighed. "But we must retrieve him.'

"If he wants to come back. I'm sure he's pretty pissed with us" Sam finally spoke up.

'It's Cas, I'm sure he'll come around." Dean silently prayed.


	8. Healing

So his wonderings brought him to another city. He was there for two day and he was walking a particularly bad street when he was startled by loud bangs. Suddenly a woman let out a long cry and a man took off running from an alleyway. He slowly walked over to where he had run from and in the alley a lady was holding a small figure in her arms.

She was young and held a boy in her arms, about ten, and he was bleeding from two holes in his chest.

She looked up. 'Please my son! Call an ambulance please, he was shot!"

He stood there for a moment, uncertain. For some reason it reminded him of a much older time, empires ago. Castiel had hurt his newly growing wings very badly playing with Gabriel. His deep blue eyes had been watery and Gabriel's that were usually so shiny were struck with fear of what Michael or Lucifer would say. _Please Ralphy, help him._

'That won't be necessary." He heard himself say. He walked over and knelt in front of the boy and the sobbing mother. He placed a hand over the wounds and closed his eyes in concentration. He remembered that old feeling under his Grace, he pulled on it. A familiar sensation came over him and he felt it in his hand. But his Grace was still very weak and he didn't have much energy. He let go of the familiar feeling and gasped as he opened his eyes. He wavered and nearly fell to the side but caught himself.

The mother had a look of awe and bewilderment but when she looked down at her son, his eyes blinked open and the two holes in his chest were much shallower. "Mama, it hurts.'

"Oh! Oh my boy, my baby!" she cried and held him tighter. She cried more and the boy hugged her. She looked at Raphael as he began to get to his feet. "You! Thank you so much. You must be an angel!" she had a smile and bright eyes.

It discomforted him. 'I was. Take him to an infirmary." And he left.

_How long have I-_ what? Been walking? Since I last ate? Since I woke up? Lucifer was sure it was well over a month or two since he awoke in the field but time was sluggish. At the moment he was more focused on the pain in his empty stomach and being tired.

He was walking through some swamp/ marsh like areas for most of the night but he didn't stop. While in a big city where people had voodoo decorations and colorful mask and plenty of French accents to go around he thought he would settle for awhile. However, needing money, he tried his hand with card tricks at the tables. It all went well for awhile till he was caught, and by the wrong people. The sot of small time mob boss had his men take him to the back alley. He had fought book and took many down but he was greatly outnumbered.

And to make matters worse, some angels showed up.

_Well, all hail the king of Hell_

_The loveliest of us, the old favorite, now a scummy mud monkey._

Oh, he had fought but it wasn't a fight he could win, even he knew that. He was able to kill two but three more showed up so he ran, again.

He spat on the ground, he hated running off, it was ridiculous. He was going to kill Bartholomew himself.

On his travel he had been on a pave road but passed by a man with a poorly tailored suit and a suitcase. As he passed him he gave a cheeky smile. "Nice place New Orleans, am I right?"

"If you live off of cheap tricks and gambles then, yeah." He replied sarcastically.

The man remained unphased "We all have our ways to live. My bet is that you do to, son." Eyeing him knowingly he walked on.

He was practically stunned and had the urge to yell at the retreating man that he knew not a single thing of him and should know who he was talking to. After that he stayed off the main roads.

He was Lucifer, the Morning Star, Archangel, one of the oldest of Father's creation. Then he was the Fallen, the Devil, he was what they feared. But now? Now he was hardly above a human, and very filthy one at that.

"You should have forfeited."

He stopped and looked to his side. No, it couldn't be. But standing there was Michael. He had a smug look on his face.

"I told you not to go against us, against Father. And now look at you. No better than a human."

"I'm still better than those cockroaches! I still have part of my Grace!"

"Hardly." He sniffed. "You are hardly even to Human standards. You a beggar, and it is rather fitting. Oh how the mighty fall."

"Shut up!" he yelled and it was gone. He huffed and ran a hand through his hair then began to walk. It wasn't real. It was just an illusion, nothing more.

He walked and walked, his steady pace was long gone and he trudged on.

"I did what I had to."

He closed his eyes then turned slowly. Raphael was standing there with an almost forlorn look.

"I didn't want to brother. But you forgot about me."

He paused. "No, I could never forget about you Ralph. You always had the cooler head, even better than Michael.'

He shook his head. "No, you forgot about me, they all do. Michael just needed a soldier so that's what I became."

"No. No, Michael's wrong. We aren't just soldiers and warriors. We were family, brothers! We didn't deserve this."

He looked into his eyes. "I-I didn't want to be just left alone, forgotten, I did what I had to do." And he held his hands up. They were covered in blood.

"No, Ralph, no!" and Lucifer went as if to grab him. But he held empty air.

He stood for a panicked second. "No, this is-this is crazy!" and he began to run. He had to get out of the swamp. He ran, stumbling about. He would trip over lazy roots, cursing, and would scramble back up. He kept running, ducking under tree limbs, clawing through underbrush but soon fell again.

"Need a hand there?" he could hear the smirk.

He sighed, closing his eyes to the ground then opening them again as he brought himself up. "No." He stood and sure enough, there was Gabriel.

He had a smirk, eyes dancing, a lollipop in his mouth. "Sure bro.'

Lucifer glanced around, half expecting Michael and Raphael to jump out. "So what? You gonna tell me how bad I've been and shit?"

He rolled his eyes. "We've all done our fair share of fuck ups, okay? Mikey, Ralph, Cassy, we just got to deal. Hell, I have some things I ain't proud of to."

"You, really." He said sarcastically.

"I know it's hard to believe. But it's not the mistakes you make; it's what you do with them after. And what you learn from them. You taught us that. Taught me." He gave a sunny smile, his amber eyes slightly sad but in the next moment, was gone.

He stood there and suddenly felt much more tired. He walked some more, not even caring if Father decided to make an appearance himself.

He finally made it to some muddy open fields, dull tall grass grew waving in the breeze, he was so tired and thirsty, hungry. The horizon was getting gray, sun ready to break. He was slowing down. He finally fell to his knees and wondered if he just stayed there, if he would finally just die. Would Father let that happen?

Then a small figure appeared in front of him. He supposed he shouldn't have been surprised. The small almost delicate figure stood somberly. His hands were at his side and his held slightly tilted to the side in an off-white robe. His dark hair was wildly astray and stormy blue eyes peered down.

He opened his mouth but found he had no words. The young Castiel held a hand out and beckoned him. He turned and began walking then looked back and beckoned again. Lucifer found himself back on his feet and he stumbled after him.

"Castiel? Castiel, wait!" he walked faster.

Little Castiel walked faster though. He began running and when he looked back his eyes had a small playful spark and he went faster. Then another boy joined him.

"Balthazar?"

And another, and another. Lucifer recognized them. They where the Seraph he had looked after, made sure they felt welcomed, had loved. Before he fell.

They ran ahead, some of them laughed, a laughter he hadn't heard in ages, so light and bright. But Castiel was always in front, making sure he was still following.

The sun broke through the horizon and he saw it. A house, a house out in front of the sun. He walked then slowed and looked back to Castiel and for the others, but they weren't there.

He stumbled forward glancing around. He thought about stopping again.

"It's not that far."

He looked up and a few yards away was Castiel as he was now. He glanced at him then to the house. "We're all waiting, no matter what. If there's one thing I've learned from the humans is family. But I realized, this was a belief you held before humanity came about. You loved us all so much that it destroyed us, it was so powereful."

Lucifer stumbled towards him, he walked and walked and got closer and closer. He could now see the detail of the house. Castiel waited. He walked but he just couldn't take it anymore and fell at his feet. "I'm sorry." He muttered, but soon voices swirled around him.

When he next woke he started at the voice around him. He half expected to find his brothers there, just as he had seen them before. But he looked up to a wooden roof and in something warm, a bed. He blinked rapidly and sat up quickly.

"Whoa there boy. You just sit back."

He turned and saw a lady sitting there, small towel in a bowl of water.

'We found you out in the field." A voice spoke up. It was a boy of twelve, freckles and curly brown hair. "You was hurt so we brought you in."

"What happened?" he breathed heavily.

"You were hurt and downright tired. Running a fever. You been out only a few days."

"_Days?_"

She nodded. "Two."

He sat back on the bed, the information ,making him more drained. He heard the lady say "You run out Jordan and make sure Penny's okay." And then the bustle of light feet.

He swam in and out of sleep. He noticed the light then the dark. Sometimes the little boy was there, once a little girl with big eyes. When he finally woke up it was the little boy again. "Hi. You feelin' better mister?"

"Like I got rammed by a train?" He muttered as he stretched.

The boy let out a whistle. "I reckon' that must hurt." After awhile he said. "Mamma makin' supper, you should come eat. We've been spoon feeding you soup whenever you were awake enough."

Lucifer flushed at the thought of needing to be spoon fed but the boy was as if though it were nothing.

"At least you're better now.' He said cheerfully.

"Jordan?" he asked pointing. He nodded eagerly. "Well Jordan, anyone ever say you talk a lot."

"Well Mama and Penny."

"Penny?"

"My little sister."

"Hhmm, well they might be right." He grunted as he through his legs over the edge of the bed. He made to get up and the boy quickly went to his side to help him. He tossed his arm up to get the kid to step away. The boys face flashed with a bit of hurt but took a step back. Lucifer felt something, something he refused to call guilt, but damit if this kid didn't remind him of the Cherubs and Seraphs that would reel back whenever he and Michael got into a fight. "I got it kid, I got it."

He stood slowly and wavered as his equilibrium got back but still stood. He stretched some more.

"So who were you talking about?"

He paused. "What?"

"In your dream while you slept, you kept saying different names and stuff. Some of them sounded like Bible names then you said father a couple times too."

He frowned. "None of your business."

After awhile the boy said quietly. 'Do you have daddy troubles too?"

"Too?"

He nodded sadly. "My Papa ran off when Penny was born, said he was gonna find work. Didn't hear from him no more after that. Mamma a tailor so we get enough money with her so we don't need him but, still."

Lucifer closed his eyes, no way was he going to have a moment right now with some random boy whose house he woke up in. He sighed. "Yeah, dads can suck." He turned to him then gently clapped his shoulder. 'C'mon, didn't you saying something about food earlier?"

And he would lie. He would lie and tell people, everyone, that the two weeks he spent there, healing up, wasn't relaxing, that it didn't give him new insight, that it didn't give him a warm feeling. He wouldn't admit that he liked waking up and helping around a house. He didn't watch out after Penny and Jordan when they played, that he didn't enjoy the cooking and warm bed. No, he never taught Jordan any small self defense moves to use against bullies or anyone else. No he would never say that he didn't like sitting by the fireplace and telling the kids stories and having them fall asleep against him just as his younger brothers had. No, he would never say that it made him remember, remember his brothers or that it made him miss them. Or that that's how he came to a decision or that he didn't have a sad feeling when he left.

'You leavin' us?" Jordan said sadly, kicking the tuff of ground.

Penny hung to his neck. 'Don't leave us like Papa." She murmured and he would never say it twisted his heart.

No, their mamma never said 'Hush childs, Mr. No Name here has got to go." Or that she gave him a playful smile. Lucifer didn't give them his name because here, it didn't matter.

'Yeah, yeah I have to go."

"But why?" Penny cried.

"Because I have to go find my family, to make sure they're fine.' He said softly pulling her off, she reminded him of Anna.

She gave him a pout but seemed to understand. "Fine, but you have to bring them to visit, you hear? All your brothers!" she held her arms up wide.

And he n ever consented, never said "Of course." With a smile and handed her back to her mother who he hugged. "Thank you, for everything."

'Pf, course child. And don't you go pulling anymore fights. You go find your family, but in one piece!"

"Of course ma'am."

She gave a 'harrumph' but smiled and took Penny to the house.

And he didn't kneel down to Jordan. 'Hey, hey kid. I need you to watch your mom and sister, okay? Can you do that?"

He glanced up. "Yeah."

He nodded "Okay" and Jordan never suddenly hugged him.

"Take care.'

"Of course." Lucifer said quietly as he hugged him back. "You too."

He got up and then walked. As he got farther he glanced back and gave a wave. And no, there were no tears. And no one else would know so no one could prove him wrong.


	9. Found

The rides were long. Every now and then he would meet some interesting people but other than that they were weird or rude. He stared out the window.

Honestly, Gabriel wasn't sure about anything but if he was right about his hunch on his brothers, well then he was the only one with an actual heading, the others were either wondering aimlessly or just weren't there. But he refused to think that. _Shake it off Gabe, you know they're around. You can feel them._

He kept telling himself but he wasn't at full power either. What if he was completely wrong? What if he was imagining it, he had felt them there, in the back of his mind for so long, centuries. Even when he was away with the pagans he felt it at the very, very back. It had dimmed away over times and he remembered being briefly worried that they were gone. But no they had just forgotten him. Until the turn of the Twentieth century, then the buzz was doubling as the coming of the Winchesters got closer. And he knew and saw what could happen but he ignored and drowned his angelic abilities in hearty mead and wild endeavors.

So maybe he was wrong, maybe even if his brothers came back they just moved on without him. _No, that's not true._ He had seen the look in Castiel's eyes, in Lucifer's even as he delivered the final blow. But then why wouldn't it be true, he had left them.

The scariest thought was that they were dead. He hardly even acknowledged the notion. It had only been a couple of weeks of his journey across the country, they could be anywhere, he just had to look hard enough.

He would go one way but it would feel wrong so he would go back and try another direction. He had started heading to Kansas but something had him change and he headed more north west. It was one big guess and check game and he was getting increasingly frustrated.

He could conjure up small tricks and was able to get money like that and get by but he was tired of this hobo train hopping thing. His spirit was dampening with every town he left behind, with every crossing of city limits.

He got off the bus and found himself in Idaho. _Why the Hell not?_ He thought. At this point he wasn't sure what to expect to find, he never really did. Would one of his brothers be randomly sitting on a park bench, or if he got lucky waving a sign around saying "Angelic but Graceless brother of Gabriel, right here!" No, he didn't think Dad would let him be so lucky.

He wandered a bit and the fuzzy feeling in the back of his mind was getting stronger but he still didn't really have a solid sense of it.

He kept walking and saw a gas station of the side of the road he was trudging on with a small store. He was hungry so decided to go grab some food. It had been a long time since he had last ate not to mention he had last had a shower at a trucker stop a night ago. They could at least lend him a water hose. As he walked over he glanced reflexively through the window and saw the cashier. He froze. Then took a double take and blinked. Twice. "No. Fuckin'. Way."

His heart sped up faster, his spirit suddenly stirring and feeling much lighter than he had in days; he broke into a grin and began jumping in a circle. "Yes, yes, YES!" then turned up to the sky. "Okay, okay, I'm sorry for all the things I yelled. You did kind of had it coming but thanky you Daddy, thank you, thank you!" he grinned and put a skip to his step. "It's like Christmas!"

He practically ran to the store, clicking his feet in the air, and was surprised Castiel hadn't turned around. He snuck into the store and went around the back. He grabbed a bag of candy and got in line, practically vibrating with glee. The man standing behind him gave him an odd look. Gabriel grinned wider. The man seemed to think the better of things and left instead. Gabriel shrugged, he didn't care.

So when the last person left he stepped forward and slammed the bag of sweets on the counter. "I'm gonna call in the older sibling card and have you treat me."

He desperately wished he had a camera then.

Castiel's face had a small calm look then morphed, his eyes growing huge and round in disbelief, mouth slowly opening then closing. Then came the rapid blinking and finally he swallowed. "Gabriel?" he walked around the counter till he was a few steps in front of him.

"Who else could look this sexy?" he had a shit eating grin.

Castiel made almost a choking sound and reached up a hand. "It- it is really you! Not an illusion of my sub conscious?" his head tilting to the side slightly, eyes squinting.

Gabriel snorted as he took his hand and put it on his cheek and then cried gleefully. "No, no, no Cassy! It's really me!" he shook him by the shoulders happily.

"Oh my Father!" he said still in shock but a small smile graced his mouth and Gabriel grinned more. 'You're alive."

"Duh!" he waved his arms up and pulled him into a hug and rocked them.

Castiel was still for a split moment but then wrapped his arms around Gabriel, only slightly awkward. "Gabriel this is very good. It is- I!" and he let out what could only be a chuckle. 'Well, only you can trick death!"

"Well who else?!"

The held each other for another new moments before they finally parted. Castiel actually had a smile and there was a small familiar spark in his blue eyes, one Gabriel hadn't seen in a millennium.

'But how? Father."

He shrugged. 'I guess the old man thought to cut me some slack; I mean how many times hasn't it happened to you?"

Something morphed over Castiel's features; regret and sorrow. "Yes, but I do not deserve any of it."

'What the hell you talking about Cas?" when he was silent he felt worried. "Cas? What happened, what went on when I was gone?" he asked softly.

He licked his lips nervously and glanced around, shifting uneasily. Finally he faced him. "I've done terrible things since you've been gone, Gabriel, since the Apocalypse. Terrible things, and now others face the consequences. In fact, I am being hunted. It is unsafe to be near me, you should go while you can." He glanced around.

Gabriel was still as he studied his face, his stance. Castiel sighed and made to move but Gabriel held him in place by the arm. "We need to talk, tell me everything. I've been running cross country looking for someone and now that I've found you I ain't leaving any time soon. Because I know that no matter what, you wouldn't do anything unless you thought it was right."

'You can't say that."

"You were my charge. Who else but me can say that baby bro?" he gave an easy smile.

Castiel frowned, though Gabriel would say it was more of a pout. "Don't call me that."

The door to the back opened and a lady walked in with some small boxes. She stopped and looked up in surprise. "Oh, hey Steve." She then gave Gabriel, and his hand, a pointed glance.

Castiel gave a polite smile. 'Nora." He merely said.

Gabriel raised an eyebrow and then rolled his eyes when Castiel didn't seem to get it. He gave his arm a squeeze.

"Oh, Nora this is my-uh"

"Brother." Gabriel smiled as he walked up and shook her hand. "I am . . . Steve's . . . brother, Gabriel.' He turned and gave him a smirk at the name.

Castiel rolled his eyes. 'This is Nora, my employer."

'Hey, oh wow, Steve didn't tell me he had brothers.'

"Oh really?" He said in mock surprise. "Embarrassed of us, Stevey?"

Castiel's eyebrow twitched. "Very."

"Us? There's more?" she asked in surprise.

"Oh yes, the more the merrier." Gabriel grinned and Castiel held his mouth in a tight line, of course he was going to have fun with this. "You should just see us at Christmas. Actually I hope you don't, our diners can be very . . . eventful."

"Oh wow, sounds like a very vibrant family. And Steve is so calm."

"Yes, he was the quieter one."

"But he's so great, such a hard worker and caring.'

"Wow, wooing the ladies are we." Gabriel wiggled his eyebrows at Castiel.

Nora blushed slightly. "Well like I said, he a great catch."

Said Steve was starting to shift nervously, unhappy with being the center of attention. Finally he broke in, "Nora, may I take my break, and my lunch break. I would like to talk with my brother."

'Of course, take all the time you need.' She smiled. 'You're such a hard worker, you absolutely should."

"Thank you." He nodded.

"Yeah, thanks." Gabriel smiled and clapped Castiel's shoulder as they left. "Would you please take off the vest!?" he cried.

"No." was the stubborn reply.


	10. Patching

Michael was still very weak and tired. He woke up the following day in a small empty room and a comfortable bed. An actual bed. And he was warm. No cold nipping at his toes or nose, no moisture or damp floor to lay on. He was in a soft warm bed that might as well have been a cloud. He smiled. _Oh, Father, thank you!_ He closed his eyes and fell back asleep in exhaustion.

When he later woke he was more conscious and realized he must have been carried to this place because he had no recollection of walking. He heard voices outside his room. _Dean and Sam._ He remembered.

He gave a sigh not wanting to get out of bed but the terrible knotting feeling in his stomach told him he had to consume something, soon.

He rose from his bed and walked out quietly. He followed the hall to some stairs and descended. Sam was lying on a couch with a laptop, Dean at the table eating a sandwich.

"Well papa halo boy is up. How'd you sleep?" Dean called, eyes weary and he saw the way his fingers twitched automatically as though reaching for the gun in his waist band or the knife in his pocket. Trust was something to be gained, he knew that.

Sam looked up and gave a careful smile, though he seemed unsure of what to make of the situation.

'Like you wouldn't believe.' He said with sincerity. "ii had no idea a warm bed could be so great.'

'Where had you been staying before?" Sam asked.

He shrugged. 'Any place I could find. Alleys, warehouses, abandoned buildings." He felt uncomfortable with the topic and their glances. "I'm sorry is there any food I may have. I am experiencing some more hunger."

'Of course, help yourself." Sam said quickly and gestured to the kitchen.

"Yeah, we got some instant food. Just use the microwave.' Dean said around his stuffed mouth.

There was a beat of silence then an unsure 'Okay."

Dean cursed under his breath and went to help him though he didn't leave his weapons behind.

He gave a sigh. He then promptly slammed his phone on the table. "That's it, we're going to Idaho. We had a case to check out over there anyways." Dean ran a hand through his hair.

Michael quickly stood. "I will pack." And left quickly.

Dean had felt so antsy with him. They had brought him to the bunker and honestly he felt horribly guilty. He had kicked Cas out but had his brother here? Honestly he hadn't been that bad. It was unnerving see him walk around but he mostly kept to himself in the library, reading. Once or twice they caught him in the gym/training room but not much else. But he was growing restless and tense, wanting to go after his brothers, especially Castiel since they knew where he was, Dean to. He had been trying to get in contact with Cas the past week.

At first he called once or twice, honestly scared to confront this. But when Castiel gave no answer at all he got worried and continuously called but it said the phone was not in service. To hell with that, he had gotten him his phone.

"Finally.' Sam grumbled. He stood and closed his laptop.

"Okay but, we're going to solve this case first and pick him up on the way back, I don't want to drag him in this while in the middle of a case."

"You sound concern.' Sam replied sarcastically.

Dean tightened his hand to a fist then straightened it. 'Don't start Sam. Of course I'm concerned but I did what I had to and I would again.'

"That's the sad thing, I know you would.' Then he went up to pack.

Within the hour they were on the road driving. Michael fell asleep in the back seat then woke offering to drive.

'Hell na." Dean cried.

It wasn't to long but they drove till they reached their destination. They got a motel room and moved into it, setting there bags around. After awhile Dean and Sam were in suits.

"Is your angel Grace covering a five mile radius cause we have a case to work on?"

'I am sure he will be fine for a few hours. If he begins showing fatigue bring him back or I will go.' Michael said evenly. He had agreed to stay in the room. Dean had commented on how he didn't want to be "babysitting".

"Whatever.' He walked out.

As Sam was leaving he glanced back. "Michael?"

"Yes." He turned to him.

"Thanks." And he left.

Michael had a small smile and turned on the television. They weren't so bad.

It took only a day and a half. Nothing much, just some angry ghost. But they decided to stay in the room; Cas was only half an hour away.

But it was the following morning that tension between Sam and Dean finally gave. It hard been going on with snide comments, tense glances. Sam was still obviously mad with Dean over the ordeal with Gadreel though they had said little on the matter.

Michael had actually been asleep when he awoke to shouts. He woke up, bleary rubbing his eyes and looking around.

Dean had his hand in fist and a well pissed off expression. He gave an angry shout. "Screw you!" And left with a slam of the door that waved a tremor through the room, the pane cracking.

Sam growled and angrily hit a wall. He then slumped and sat on the edge of the other bed and rubbing his knuckles. "Sorry you had to see that.' He said quietly. He then turned to him with sad brown eyes, taking in his expression. "What is it?"

Michael, who had been staring, sighed. 'I just realized what my younger brothers witnessed while Lucifer and I would fight." He said quietly and closed his eyes with regret.

Dean was just steaming with angered. He had done what he thought was right, was that so wrong? He only wanted to protect Sam, he always had to protect his little brother, it's just how things were. It had cost him Cas though. No Cas was his best friend, he understood. He always came back.

So he drove his Baby down the road till he was pulling into a now familiar gas station.

Castiel had been much better lately. After talking to Gabriel he half expected him to spit at him and walk away. But no, Gabriel understood as usual and had assured him that he was trying to do what was right. _Thing is Cassy, it's your best asset and your worst flaw; your innocence. Not exactly naïve but you have always had this innocence that allows you to pass a clear judgment but people could use it to trick you._ He had said.

So for the past week or so Gabriel had moved in with him to his small apartment and had been staying there. He was unsure of the arrangement but Gabriel wasn't that bad to stay with and they didn't really clash. Together they were working out the human situation and Gabriel often tagged along at work. He said he would go find a job somewhere else, to give themselves some space, but for now he was content following Castiel around the small market.

"Can you put this on your paycheck?" Gabriel said around a mouthful of M&Ms.

Castiel rolled his eyes. "Of course, you're already eating them. Beside I doubt Nora would mind."

Gabriel smirked as he helped put some boxes in the side. "When is she inviting us to dinner again, that was some great steak. Tykes a cutie too."

He frowned. "We can't just invite ourselves, it's rude.'

"I know." He whined 'Just use some of that good ol' sex hair charm.'

Castiel snorted. "I don't understand that reference."

"Said the not a virgin no more."

Castiel's face flushed and he gave a glare but Gabriel merely smirked and popped more candies in his mouth.

Castiel was just wiping down the counter and glanced out at the new car that had pulled in and the driver making way. He froze and dropped his rag and glanced at Gabriel then outside.

Gabriel read his fear and reached to his waist band where he kept his angel knife and quickly moved to him. "What is it? Who is it?!"

"Uh, Dean!" he let out.

Gabriel turned out the isle just as Dean walked in. He skidded and quickly back pedaled and crouched in the aisle.

Dean walked in with a small smile and crinkle in his eyes. "Hey Cas. How you doing buddy?"

Castiel stood frozen then blinked, not glancing at the aisle in front of him where Gabriel hid. "Dean, this is an unexpected surprise. I've been fine thank you.' His tone was slightly clipped.

"Well, business seems good." Dean said glancing around. He took a peek at a magazine.

Castiel took that moment to look at Gabriel who was crouched down. He shook his head vigorously and put a finger to his lips indicating he still didn't want to be known. Castiel blinked in understanding.

"Yes, it has been fine." Castiel moved to behind the cash register.

Dean gave a small smile. "So how's your place?"

"A tight fit." He grimaced. Out of the aisle to the side a hand poke out with the finger. He gave a cough to hide his chuckle. "But nothing I can't handle."

"Really? Well that's great Cas, your adjusting well!"

"I suppose I am." He said busing himself with some drawers underneath, he hoped he would just leave if ignored.

"No, seriously man, it's great!" Dean had been trying to catch his eyes. After a moment he asked. 'Is something wrong?"

To his credit he didn't even pause. "No, why do you ask?"

"Well, you seemed distracted." He walked a bit more. "Unfocused."

'Uh, no, I am fine, just usual humanity."

"Hhmm." He said as he walked. He was approaching Gabriel's aisle and he was creeping back.

"I-uh- hey! Was there something specifically you needed? Maybe I could help with that." Castiel said quickly.

Dean stopped and turned back to him. "Uh, no, just visiting. Hey maybe I could see the apartment. Stop by for some pie and we could relax, once your done working of course."

"I get off late today." He hedged.

"I have nothing to do, just finished up a case. I don't mind waiting.'

He realized Dean had no intention of leaving soon, however he couldn't know about Gabriel. He had to get him to leave. It hurt him slightly, pushing his friend away, but he pushed that feeling down.

"Uh, well it is a bit of a mess and I wouldn't want to invite anyone over till it's cleaned up." He said airly.

Dean paused then gave a nod. 'Ah."

"Yeah, so what are you doing here?" Castiel asked point blank.

"I told you." He gave a smile though under it he could tell he was miffed.

"But Idaho isn't exactly a street away from the bunker."

He nodded. 'We had a case."

'You and Sam."

He hesitated then nodded. "Essentially, yes. And, ugh, Sam got mad at some stuff and we started fighting, I mean I admit it all ended badly but I mean I had to do it!"

Castiel froze as he looked at him. More correctly he looked over his shoulder. Gabriel was creeping behind him and making for the staff door. "So . . . you had a fight?"

"Yeah and I just needed to get out and man, I just-"

The staff door closed with a click. Dean quickly whirled and looked around. "What was that?"

"What?" Castiel asked trying to fake innocence.

"That noise, a door closing."

Castiel mentally cursed the hunters instinct. "No it wasn't."

"Uh, yeah Cas, it was. The staff door."

"No."

He sighed. 'Cas, is Nora or someone here?" Dean made way to the door and Cas quickly cut him off.

"Uh, yes, a new staff member. He was probly messing about back there.'

"Oh, really?" he crossed his arms.

'Yes."

"Then let me see." He nodded his head to the door.

"What?"

"Let me see behind the door."

"Uh, I can't let you do that."

"And why not?"

He glanced at the door and then met Dean's face evenly. "Because you are not staff." He said rather proudly.

Dean snapped. "Oh, c'mon Cas. Seriously?!"

"Very."

Dean sighed and turned and paced away. He knew Cas' stubbornness.

"So you're fight?"

"Hhmm?"

"You were at the part where you needed a place to breath." He said plainly.

"Well yeah but- ugh- no Cas, not just that. I really did want to see you."

"I am sure." A layer of sarcasm covered his words. He went to some boxes and carried them to the side.

"Cas, I'm serious okay."

'Okay, but I'm very busy right now." He said.

Dean glanced around the empty door in exasperation. "I'm sorry, is _this_ being too busy for a friend."

"A friend that pushes others away, yes." He knew it was a low blow but he was grasping here.

Dean's face contorted and he licked his lips as he glanced away and turned back to him. 'Cas listen, let me-"

"I don't want to hear it Dean." He really didn't, he didn't want to face anymore pain of rejection. He had just gotten a brother back, things were going good and Dean had made his position clear so he wanted things to be just how they were, as good as possible. He grabbed so boxes to move them.

"C'mon Cas. Look I –"

"No, Dean."

"But Cas we found-"

"Enough Dean.' He dropped the boxes on the counter.

"Cas, just listen!"

"No I think-" he cut off for a second but then said. "You can't stay."

There was a long pause before Dean blinked and asked, "What?"

"You can't stay, Dean." He held his face. But he saw the hurt in Dean's eyes, the lash of pain and disbelief. His eyes searched him, for anything to give away but Castiel held his face impassive.

Dean opened his mouth then closed it. Then he opened it again; he wanted to sprout denials, to yell that he couldn't do this to prove to him but he was very well familiar with the phrase. Instead he let out a "Fine." He said quietly. "Okay."

He held up a hand as if to pat his shoulder or just to touch him but then he dropped it. He turned and walked away quickly. He went to his car and Castiel clenched his eyes as he heard the driver door slam shut and then it was peeling out of the gas station.

After awhile the staff door opened.

"It's safe now." He said.

"You didn't have to go that far.' Gabriel said quietly.

Castiel gave a sad nod. 'I did, actually." Then he turned with a small smile. "And isn't that what brothers do?"

Gabriel suddenly felt horrible seeing his sullen face. He pat his shoulder. "Hey after work lets go to a bar or something to grub and just chill. I'll treat you.'

"You have no money?"

'Just don't worry where the money comes from. I still got tricks." He said. 'Besides it's time I pay you back."

He gave a small rueful smile.

So after that stab from Castiel Dean was left shaken. Cas had always been there. He was a support beam; he always came back, even after all the shit Dean ever pulled on him. But maybe he had pushed it too far because now it seemed like Cas wasn't coming back to him. Dean tightened his hands around the steering wheel, Stupid_ angels._ Why should he care? Why should he care that those deep blue eyes had turned cold on him or that he didn't have that small smile at the edge of those bow shaped lips?

Dean needed to find a bar and fast. So he did, out of city limits, and promptly got shit face drunk and went home with a blond whose name he would never remember.

It was around noon the next day that Dean stumbled into their motel room.

"Where the hell have you been?" Sam cried when he walked in.

Dean said nothing as he stumbled to the bed Michael wasn't sitting and reading on and fell face forward.

"Dean! Where were you? What were you doing, jerk?"

'Shut up bitch. Can't you see I have a bad as hell hangover?" he muttered to the pillow.

Sam shared a look of disbelief with Michael then groaned. He then went and got some food for them and saved some for Dean.

Around five Dean woke to eat and that was when he told about Cas.

"You saw him?! How is he?" Michael quickly asked as he stood up, toppling the chair over. "Why didn't you tell us earlier?!"

Dean glared. "Look, I tried talking to him but he had a stick up deeper than before in his ass. He was all pissy and wouldn't let me speak. So I don't think he wants to be with us!"

Michael narrowed his eyes. "I'll talk to Castiel. I need to speak with him."

Sam had let out a chuckle.

'What?!" Dean snapped.

'You can't really blame him.' Sam shrugged. "You, his profound bond partner, kicked him out and you didn't give him a good reason. I don't blame him for not wanting to talk to us. We haven't been exactly civil with him. He can only take so much of our crap."

"Shut up Sam! You don't think I realize that!" Dean roared slamming his hand down on the table.

"And" Sam pushed unperturbed. "I bet you put your foot in your mouth or you couldn't say the right thing.' He said smugly.

As an answer Dean stuffed more of his burger in his mouth.

'That's what I thought. We do need to go back to talk to him though. You need to apologize and maybe Michael can get him to listen." Sam said evenly.

"Yes, we will leave now." Michael said standing up and grabbing his jacket. Sam stood after him and Dean grumbled about not being able to finish his burger but was the first one out the door.

Dean had written down his address before hand so they found it and parked on the side of the street. It was a flat that had stairs outside that led up to it. It seemed roomy enough and a light was on in the window. They got out of the car. Michael was already racing ahead as they got out but then paused momentarily, staring up.

Dean went up to him. "I'll go first. Try this again. If you just suddenly pop out on us he might get surprised into a heart attack and that's the last thing I-we want."

Michael gave a curt nod. Him and Sam followed behind Dean and waited on a turn in the metal stairs. Dean climbed to the top across their small 'porch', or whatever it could be called. He heard shuffling of feet and slight banging as well as music playing loudly, _Eurythmics, Missionary Man?_ Dean wondered where the hell Cas had gotten that from. He knocked on the door.

There was a silence inside the apartment. Dean sighed and knocked again. "Cas, it's me, can you open up please?"

"Uh- who is it?" the music was turned down and there was shuffling.

"Cas, this isn't funny, open up."

He heard another hush noise then "What are you doing here Dean?"

"To get a picture with Santa, what the hell you think?! We're here to see you!" he cried exasperated.

Sam and Michael climbed the steps a little more.

There was more shuffling and then he heard it. Hushed voices. One too many from what Dean knew. "Cas?" he glanced at Sam and Michael who got closer. "Someone else is in there.' Dean whispered.

Sam had a bewildered expression. "Maybe he brought someone home?"

Dean froze then gave him a look then suddenly turned around and knocked harder. "Cas, open this dam door! I swear on your Daddy I will break it down!"

"Don't you dare Dean!" but there was another hush voice still. "Just leave me alone. Go away!"

Dean shared a look with Sam but then Michael stepped up. He stood for a moment in front of the door, remembering.

_It had been when they were all young. Gabriel had been playing tricks on angels and he decided to test out Lucifer's blade. He went down to the newly made Earth to play around with it and had caught up in a distraction and had actually lost the sword on Earth. He had flown back up and was seeking a place to hide. He went to a room that was Castiel's, like his Heaven, and asked him to stay there till Lucifer found out then cooled down. Of course Castiel allowed him; he was under his charge after all. But Michael found out before Lucifer. He went and learned of Gabriel's hide away. He approached the closed doors of a favorite of Castiel's Heaven and knocked._

"_Please, go away." Castiel had called out._

"_Castiel, let me in please." Michael called back. "It's me." _

"_Yes?" he asked in a light voice, a child's play. _

"_I know who you have in there. Please open up, I can assure you it's safe for both of you."_

"_How can you be sure?" this time Gabriel called out._

_Michael's lip had twitched. 'Because I'll keep you safe."_

And now Michael was standing in front of a closed door and he would bet his life he knew who was inside. He found himself repeating the same words from so long ago.

"Castiel, let me in please." He called out. Dean and Sam looked surprised at his tone that had dropped to a soothing voice. Inside it had gotten even quieter, as though no one was even breathing.

"What are you doing?" Dean asked but Michael held up a hand for silence.

Michael licked his lips, nervous. "It's me."

"Yes?" came the quiet response. He sounded much closer to the door, as though he couldn't help it.

He swallowed. "I know who you have in there. Please open up, I can assure you it's safe. For both of you."

There was silence for a minute. Then another. Michael was unsure if he should call again then he got the response he was praying to hear.

"How can you be so sure?"

Dean straightened at the voice, not knowing who it was but Sam actually perked up with a surprise expression.

Michael was smiling then stepped closer and earnestly called. "Because _I'll_ keep you safe."

After another moment of silence the sound of the door unlocking came. The knob turned and it opened very slowly. Castiel stood where the door was cracked open and he stared with his ethereal blue eyes and an expression that was rarely seen. One of surprise and something else. "Michael.' He whispered then opened the door all the way. Standing behind him was Gabriel.

"Shit.' Dean gasp.

Sam smiled and let out a small. "Gabriel."

Michael stood and smiled. "Castiel, Gabriel, I knew you guys were safe." He then went forward and pulled them together for a hug. After a moment Gabriel hugged back then Castiel, though he looked surprise. After awhile it wasn't so much a hug but more like they were clinging on to each other, finally having something sturdy to lean on, to share a burden.

"It's nice to see you big bro.' Gabriel mumbled into his shoulder.

"And much like yourself.' Castiel added.

Michael let out a breathless chuckle. "I can say much the same." He let them go and took a step back. "We have much to talk about."

Dean gave a loud cough. "Apparently all of us do."

He tried to spread his gaze but his eyes had locked on Castiel.

Cas gave a bashful nod. "That is true. Please come in, we were just making dinner."

The apartment opened up to the living room that held a small couch and TV. In the back left was a hall that led to the bedrooms and bathroom. The back right was a kitchen/ dining room. Gabriel and Castiel had cooked homemade pizza with a salad and drinks. Since there was only one small table and limited chairs Michael, Castiel and Sam sat at the table, Dean and Gabriel took the counter tops.

"This is great, you guys made this?" Sam smiled into the homemade pizza.

"Sure did Samsquatch. Got it out of a magazine."

"Needs meat." Dean muttered around it though he obviously liked it.

"And this sauce?' Michael asked pointing at his salad

"We also got the recipe from a magazine." Castiel nodded.

Michael smiled proudly at his brothers. "I'm happy to see that you have adapted to humanity with little trouble.'

Something in the air got colder. Castiel was carefully looking down and Gabriel was glaring at Dean.

"Well I had my time with the humans so it wasn't much trouble for me" Gabriel said airily but with an angry undertone, gaze fixed on the hunter across from him. "It was sink or swim for Castiel. Being kicked out to the street and all."

Dean put down his plate and swallowed his food. "You have something to say?"

He gave a shrug and innocent expression as if to say "who, me?"

Sam looked ready to jump between them.

'It was an interesting experience." Castiel interrupted them. "It allowed me to learn much fast. As I recall someone once said 'near death situations allow you to learn faster'" Gabriel held his glare. "During a flying lesson. While being pushed off a cloud."

Gabriel finally relaxed his posture glancing at Castiel. "Fine, whatever." Then he tossed Dean a smirk. "At least _we_ were there to catch you."

Dean reached for his knife. "That's rich coming from the guy that-"

Sam slammed the table top. "I'de rather eat without the pissing contest." Giving Dean a look.

"You want to finish that sentence?!" Gabriel's eyes flashed dangerously as he continued.

'I agree with Sam." Michael gave Gabriel a similar look.

"Thank you.' Castiel mouthed to Sam.

After that the time was filled with inconsequential babble. Finally the topic came up.

'It would be best for you to come with us.' Michael said firmly.

Gabriel snorted. 'If the Blue Brothers here wanted us they would have come for us. As a matter in fact I stayed hidden because I didn't want to be involved with them" though he was looking at Dean.

'Nonsense." Michael snorted.

"Michael, Dean did not want me there." Castiel said carefully with sad eyes, not noting when Dean nearly choked on his beer. 'I think it would be best to respect those wishes-"

"Cas!" Dean cried, interrupting. "I _wanted _you there. Believe me, I wanted you there with me-us. I really did but I couldn't have you there dammit!"

Castiel didn't look at him till Dean came to his side and gabbed his shoulder.

"Cas, you got to believe it man I _had_ to do what I did!"

"But why?!" Gabriel yelled, grabbing his shoulder and pulling him away from Castiel.

Dean immediately took this as an offensive gesture and wretched away and step up to him since Gabriel put himself between him and Castiel. They were chest to chest, Dean looking down but Gabriel had such a dark look in his normal carefree eyes.

'Don't freaking touch me!"

"Then stay away from my bro."

"Wow, hey.' Sam stood to Dean's side and put a hand on his chest. "Chill dude."

"Enough of this.' Michael said standing also.

"Oh all of a sudden you're a family man?" Dean was still sneering at Gabriel.

The lights began to flicker. "You're not one to talk, Tuesday baby, kicking family to the curb. _We_ don't do that."

"No, you guys just runaway." He spat.

The electronics were starting to give an interesting hum, the radio turning on and going haywire.

"Watch. Your tone." Gabriel grit out.

Castiel stood and put a hand on Gabriel's shoulder. "Don't. Dean please take a step back, Gabriel calm down."

"C'mon, let's just all take a breather." Sam pushed Dean a step then two back.

Gabriel finally let out with a huff. "I want you guys out."

Dean froze then yelled. "No!"

"Get out!" A light bulb popped.

"Not till you listen!"

"Why should we?!"

"Because he was fooled!" Michael finally interrupted, yelling. "Just like we were all fooled!"

Castiel gripped Gabriel's shoulder a little more, mostly with worry. "Gabriel?"

Gabriel took a few deep breaths then met Sam's then Castiel's eyes. Finally he turned to Michael. "Explain. Now, you got a minute!"

And Michael did, he ran down through what Dean had said had happened up till when Michael met them and knew who was really in Sam.

Gabriel had let out a loud string of curses, a mix of English, Enochian and maybe a bit of Norse. Castiel had gotten up and begun pacing near the window.

Dean was sitting on the couch with Michael, Sam leaning on the back.

"This is way messed up." Gabriel muttered, running a hand through his hair.

Dean looked up then turned to Castiel who had stopped and was looking out the window, an arm over his chest and his elbow on it, hand rubbing his chin as he thought. A human habit he had picked up.

Dean stood and walked over to him. 'Cas, please I'm-"

"Why didn't you just tell me?" he said throaty but soft.

Dean dropped his hands to his side. "I don't know, okay. All I knew was that Sammy was dying and this guy said he was someone who had recommendations from you and that he could heal Sam. I needed to do it."

"Bu he also said I couldn't be aware that he was around." He said turning to face him. "Did that not sound least bit suspicious?"

"Well, when you say it that way."

"Or" Castiel said quieter, mostly to himself "you didn't trust me and it was the perfect excuse to . . ." he trailed off.

"What?" then Dean got the picture at Castiel's ashamed face. 'Oh no, no, no, don't you even think that." He pointed an angry finger. 'You are very valuable, to all of us. You're our best friend Castiel and our brother. We want you around as bad as Christmas so don't you go doubting your worth because of a mistake I made."

Castiel looked at him then looked down unsure then back out the window.

Dean sighed and stepped closer. 'Look, I know, I get it. I – I broke your trust, whatever little trust you had I broke it, and – and left you hanging in a time where you needed me most. And Cas I am so sorry for that but let _me_ make it up to you. Cas?" he said softly.

Castiel finally looked at him, blue on green.

Dean had this look of clear determination and pleading, like it was a desperate wish. "Please, let me make it up to you. Let me get your trust back, come home."

There was a pause of silence as they stared intensely at each other.

'Do they do this a lot?" Gabriel whispered.

'Oh, yeah, a lot." Sam sighed.

Gabriel let out a low whistle.

"Tell me about it.'

Michael watched in amusement.

After awhile Castiel looked away and at Gabriel.

'Oh yeah, hi. Still here." Gabriel waved.

Dan sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. 'Of course the lunatic can come to.'

"You weren't going to have much if a choice. I'm going where ever Cassy goes."

Castiel gave him a small smile then looked at Michael.

"Then it's settled." Michael smiled back.

'Yes, it will take time for us to pack what little we have. Also I will need to call Nora and tell her."

"Yeah, gotta cancel Wednesday.' Gabriel put in.

"Wednesday?" Sam asked.

"Nora invited us over for dinner." Castiel explained.

'Mostly Cassie, I'm just a plus one." He smirked towards Dean who had a frown.

"And don't forget to quit.' He muttered darkly.

Castiel nodded. "We will be ready by tomorrow."

Dean gave him a small happy smile. Castiel flushed but looked away.

Gabriel sighed as he glanced around and clapped his hands 'Better get started."


	11. Changes

He didn't have anything better to do. And honestly, this was where he felt most comfortable.

He was tending to some sick people in a building. It was a poorer part of the American land and there was a small clinic set up for those who could not afford official medical attention.

Raphael was becoming sought more often because his methods were more natural, focused on the spirit and natural solutions in herbs. He wondered if his Grace was helping a bit to but it would be expected. No, he didn't show much emotion and he had followed Michael's order to the book but, he actually felt _good_ healing people. He felt wonder and relief being able to take someone and make them feel better, actually seeing something fixed. It made him think he was important again.

So he stayed at the clinic then moved then he would move again, town to town, road onto road, he went. He got clothes from liquor stores or thrift shops. He washed up at truck stops and gas station but he was restless. He would only settle in a city or town and more specifically at a clinic of sorts.

And he did love it. He loved healing people because they would smile at him or their families and for a moment it was like someone remembered who he really was again. That somewhere far off, he had a family too. And that maybe he should get back to them.

At first it was okay.

Castiel had called and told Nora as much as he could without giving any unneeded information but she still insisted on visiting him in the morning. Gabriel and Castiel had boxed whatever clothing and items they really had as their own and where just closing up the place. Gabriel had already talked to the landlord and they payments of the flat. Nora showed up with the baby and had small tears in the corner of her eyes.

"I'm really going to miss you guys. Aren't we?" she said giving her daughter a little bounce.

"May I?" Castiel asked. She smiled as she handed him the baby. He cooed at her and held her in one arm, the other teasing her nose and belly. She let out a high pitch chorus of giggles in her light green dress and happily squeezed his finger.

Nora smile happily. "She really does like you. Are you sure,' she swallowed. "I don't mean to be pushy but" she broke off seeming unable to finish.

"Hey, Nora, how ya doing?" Gabriel walked over with a grin.

She smiled as they hugged. "Hey Gabriel, have everything packed."

"Yup, all set. Hey ya, you look even more beautiful today sunshine.' He playfully pinched they baby's cheeks. Castiel handed her to him and he began to speak nonsense to her as he walked a little to the side saying. "Let's let the grownups talk."

Castiel looked at them then back to Nora. "Uh, you were asking me something?" he said nervously.

She blinked and stared up at him. "Are you sure you guys can't stay?" she asked softly. "Here." _With me_ went unspoken.

Castiel fidgeted nervously, thinking over his answer when he noticed over her head a black Impala parked across the street. The driver and passenger were getting out and crossing.

"No.' he finally answered and looked back at her. "I'm sorry but I can't. My family is going through some issues and, well, I'm needed elsewhere.'

She nodded sadly but with understanding. She gently held his shoulder as she leaned up and place a chaste kiss on his mouth then pulled away. "Well, we'll be here.' She said softly.

He gave a mute nod, cheeks flushed and eyes wide.

"Oh, hey Dean-O, didn't see you there. And Mikey, what's up?" Gabriel said loudly with a grin as he walked up to meet them.

Michael gave a small smile, Dean's mouth was in a line but he merely gave a nod. 'Hard to see with this girly, huh?" he said as he playfully tickled the girl and smiled. Michael walked up and stared at the child curiously.

"Ain't she a cutey, kinda like me."

"God I hope not." Dean said then looked up. As he walked to Nora Michael stepped closer.

"She's not going to eat you." Gabriel said evenly.

Michael warily stepped closer and held out a finger as he had seen Dean. The child wrapped her chubby little fingers around his and smiled as she squeezed. Michael felt something in him lighten and he wiggled his finger. "Hello child, you are beautiful."

She giggled.

"See, just like the Seraphs and Cherubs. She's got the cheeks for it.' Gabriel smirked as he gave a quick kiss to said cheeks.

"Hey Nora." Dean said as he walked up to them.

'Dean, nice to see you again." She said as she went up give him a quick hug. "How you've been?'

"Same ol' same ol'" he smiled. He glanced at Castiel. "Everything packed, Steve."

'Yes, the boxes are there at the stairs." He pointed.

Dean nodded and clapped his hands. "Let's get this show on the road." He called loudly.

Michael followed Dean and Castiel to the boxes and each grabbed some. Nora grabbed one as well and helped them load it to the trunk.

"Such a gentleman Gabe, making the poor girl work." Dean called as he followed them behind with the baby.

'Hey, someone had to protect the little cupcake! Speaking of sweets, where' Samsquatch."

"I don't even want to know the connection you made betweens sweets and my brother." He grumbled ignoring Gabriel's smirk.

"He stayed at the motel, we will pick him up right now.' Michael answered.

They said their final goodbyes, Gabe handing the baby to Cas as he hugged Nora goodbye and gave her a quick peck on the cheek. "You and the sunpatch take care!"

"We will, and stay out of trouble." She smiled.

"Not likely."

Castiel gave the child a kiss, and murmured into her forehead "May your Thursdays be filled with wonder." He wasn't sure if it would work, with him being human and all, but it was worth a shot. He handed her back to Nora and gave the mother a kiss on the forehead. "Thank you for everything, and take care, both of you."

"We, will, you too Steve."

He got into the back seat of the car.

As they drove off Michael glanced back at them. "She seemed nice. She was a friend?"

In the rearview mirror Dean looked at Cas who was staring out the window. He finally said. 'Yes, she was . . . a friend of ours.' He sounded almost sad.

Michael nodded. 'I . . . am sorry, that you had to leave her behind. You did seem content here.' There was an apology, as though he suddenly wasn't sure if his brothers had even wanted to come.

Castiel sighed and looked back into the car. "It is fine Michael; such is humanity and life, no?"

"So it seems."

It was a few days later, once they had somewhat settled into the bunker, that humanity and life wanted to give the boys more experience.

"This is ridiculous!" Gabriel cried. It sounded funny considering his nose was blocked up.

Michael sighed. "Open your mouth." He spoke to the form under the mound of blankets that was Gabriel.

Gabriel was flushed though mostly from fever rather than embarrassment. He had a wet towel on his forehead, Michael was sitting next to him with a bowl of soup and a spoon, Castiel sat at the foot of the bed while the Winchester brothers watched over.

Gabriel had apparently caught a bit of sickness. Nothing major but since he was fairly new to this the common cold was kicking his butt.

"I am a dam archangel, I should not-" his tirade was interrupted by his sneeze. "should not be reduced to this."

"It is a fairly normal situation brother. Humans catch the cold all the time and very few actually get severe issues." Castiel explained easily.

Gabriel glared. "But it sucks." He whines. "By head is hurting worst than when Dad hit me for being a smart ass and I can't breathe through my nose and my chest hurts. Plus there's this raw ache in my throat." He pouted.

"Welcome to humanity." Dean smirked.

"Just eat the soup and take the medicine." Sam said easily holding up a medicine bottle. 'And you'll be better.'

"It taste gross." He cried.

Suddenly Michal plunged the spoon into his mouth.

Gabriel made a muffling sound but swallowed.

'Enough, you must eat and take your medicine so that you will recover." His voice left no argument.

Gabriel was still frowning but ate the soup that he was fed.

Behind Dean smirked. He made an airplane noise as he waved his had as if to feed him as well. Gabriel shot him the bird and Dean laughed.

'Really, Dean?" Sam sighed.

"What?" he chuckled.

"Dean, enough or I will spoon feed you as well. You do need to eat more vegetables.' Michael said evenly.

Gabriel and Sam laughed as Dean huffed at that. Even Castiel cracked a smile.

After a few more bites Gabriel shook his head. "No more, it's starting taste worst."

"Then that's enough, we don't want you to get sick from your stomach too.' Sam said stepping up. "But take this medicine, it'll help."

Gabriel glared at it as Michael took it and poured out a serving. He looked at Sam. "Careful Samsquatch, we might actually think you care.'

"But I- we do. We don't want you sick.' He stumbled over his words.

Gabriel gave him a smile but before he could retort Michael put the small cup to his mouth and he swallowed it. He sat up and coughed. "Give a guy some warning."

"Sorry.' Michael said looking very unapologetic. He stood. "We will let you rest, you must sleep and recuperate. Castiel?"

Castiel and Gabriel were actually sharing a room despite the available space. The two brothers felt the need to stay together and were still weary. He turned to Michael and gave a small inclination with his head to the opposite bed. "I will stay and watch over Gabriel, to make sure he is fine."

Dean protested. "Yeah, but what if you catch it to."

"No, it is fine." But he wouldn't turn and look at him.

Dean gave a sigh but nodded. "There's TV and a computer, also books so do what you guys want." He turned to leave.

'Yeah, this is your place now." Sam said with a small smile.

Michael gave a smile as well.

"Dean'o is right, I don't' want you to catch anything." Gabriel muttered after they left. "And I don't need to have you watching me." He sneezed.

Castiel merely smiled as he went to his bed and picked up a book. 'It's my job, isn't it. I think I get that part right."

Gabriel smiled. "I guess you're right, Watcher. Just don't break the computer." He yawned. "I'll help you with that later."

Castiel smile as Gabriel nodded off to sleep then gave the computer a confused expression.

Awhile later Dean came back up with a tray. He cautiously opened the door that had only a small table lamp light on. He looked in and saw Gabriel tucked away and asleep on his bed and Cas propped up in the other. He had his back slouched to the head board of the bed and he had a book splayed on his lap. Dean couldn't help but smile.

He sat the tray on the desk and went over to Castiel. He knew that Sam was eager to settle them in and had left them books in the room, some he thought they would enjoy and to get Castiel caught up in some of their references. The book Cas had started was Harry Potter. _Really Sam?_ Dean couldn't help but scoff.

He took it carefully and placed it on the side table. He glanced around, unsure then sighed and started pulling back the blankets from under him. He, luckily, hadn't been wearing shoes so he was able to throw the blankets over him and then grabbed a pillow. He wondered how he could do this but decided to be direct. He carefully lean Castiel forward while he tried to slip it behind him.

But Cas woke up with that. 'Hmm, Dean?' he mumbled quietly.

"Dam, hey Cas sorry, but I don't need you messing up your back." He said quickly straightening and letting him go.

Castiel gave a yawn, mouth stretching open, and shifted. "Thank you, it is fine." He turned on his side and sunk deeper into the bed and blankets, a hand slipping under the pillow.

"Cool, uh." Dean nervously huffed. "Sammy made some soup so I brought it up for the clown and you. Tomato. And some grilled cheese, if you want some."

Castiel looked at the tray then his blue eyes looked up at Dean. He had been avoiding him as much as possible, not wanting to have to talk to him alone because he was afraid it would bring everything of the past up again. But now he really looked at Dean, he looked almost shy, definitely uncomfortable but had worry lines. Castiel gave a small nod. "Thank you Dean that is very kind of you, and Sam. I will eat after" he yawned "a nap and then see if I can get Gabriel to eat some as well."

Dean looked like he wanted to say something else but finally just nodded. "Cool, that's cool. So, uh, I'll just see you around." He said as he walked back towards the door.

Castiel suddenly felt very drained again so he settled with a "Yes."

Dean stood for a moment then walked to the door and was slipping out. He chanced a glance back and saw that Castiel had already slipped off to sleep. He couldn't help a small fond smile and quickly walked back over then pulled the covers up to his chin then went back to the door. "Night, Cas."


End file.
